Friday, 19 December 2008

Boris Johnson gets his Christmas presents early

In a victory for good old British uncommon sense and no-nonsense political incorrectness, Boris Johnson has fulfilled his promise to bring back the Routemaster. 

*Sort of.*
*Once somebody redesigns one*
*And builds it*
*At some point in the future*

The winning designs will be put out to tender, whereupon they will be redesigned 'pic n mix' style in order to get the minimum possible capacity, at the greatest possible cost.

All further bleatings from the politically correct naysayers/ Ken Livingstone munchkins/ commuters who want cheap and convenient travel, should be roundly ignored.

For today is a day to join hands and rejoice in the great wisdom of our new Mayor and the great shiny shinyness of his ever-so-shiny new toy.



Anonymous said...

But will it stay in the wrapper?

Val Shawcross (press release) said...

"Routemaster" competition not a serious way to make transport policy

Speaking as Boris Johnson announced the winners of his design-a-bus competition, Labour's transport spokesperson Val Shawcross said:

"The design competition may have been fun and the winning designs are extremely impressive, but this is not a serious way to make policy and not a worthwhile use of public money. If Boris actually used London's buses or talked to those who do, he would see that London's existing fleet is modern, accessible and well-designed.

"I have yet to hear one convincing argument for why London needs a new double-decker bus and until Boris comes up with some Londoners will see this as little more than a vanity project. There is understandably a lot of nostalgia for the old Routemaster but nostalgia doesn't get people to work on time."


Chris said...

Where are the Taxpayer's Alliance when you need them eh?

Tom said...

Val's taking much the right tone there, although I suppose she has to say the right things about the designs being 'impressive', even though they aren't. I love the use of 'vanity project', a direct slap at Gilligan, I feel.

The Troll said...

Well if anyone deserves to have a slap at Gilligan it's her. I wonder what she did to deserve his bile (if anything).

Anonymous said...

From the Evening Standard's comments

"Bendy buses are atrocious. I don't travel on them but they look so dangerous and it's like cattle class with nowhere to stand."

And that, ladies and gents, tells you all you need to know about the bendy 'debate' - policy informed and dictated by the terminally stupid who don't use the buses but now believe they can't sit down on them, can't stand up on them and that they might veer off the road and murder their children at the drop of a hat.

A pointless, expensive and patronising solution to a problem we don't have Mr Mayor.

The Troll said...

Throw in a bit of bleating about 'prigs' 'kiljoys' and 'Transport for Livingstone' and you've got their whole case.

Anonymous said...

It is very cynical politics. To fulfil the election pledge, a 50,000 quid competition for a drawing. No-one wants to build them, no-one wants to buy them and if one ever does appear, all it will take is a photo of a pram blocking the stairs to start off nostaligia for bendy buses.

What next? policemen should go back to wearing domed helmets? gas lamps? horse-drawn trams?

Karl said...

I don't think the point of these is to actually build them. It's going back to the drawing board for a 'year or two', and will probably be whipped out again on 2011 as an election promise for a second term. More fool the gullible if they fall for it. In the meantime, actual transport on the streets of London begins a slow descent into chaos and disorganisation.

Anonymous said...

Is the forecast chaos deliberate so that we will agree to the segregated traffic lanes for Olympic officials? This sort of exclusive traffic lane used to exist in Moscow for the top guys.